Wednesday, October 21, 2009

Freud was Right

Me being sad and cold in my fake room

Dreams are truly a pathway to the subconscious. Last night I had a dream where I was sitting in the living room of my fake family apartment and Benny started talking to me without speaking slowly or clearly. He then asked, "Hai capito?" (Did you understand?) He repeated what he said and then again asked, "Hai capito?" Everything in my dream was wearing on me and I finally exploded. I burst into tears and I said, "No, non ho capito niente!! (No, I didn't understand anything)." (Maybe it's a good sign, I'm speaking Italian in my dreams). I then continued by saying, "I can't wait to just go home and speak in English where everyone understands me and I understand everyone." Then I woke up. It was a good day. I haven't really felt that intense about not understanding consciously- maybe it truly is my subconscious speaking - I have a midterm in Italian tomorrow.

I do agree with my dream though, all I want is to be understood. It's difficult to imagine myself fluent in Italian and it frustrates me even more when I see little bambini (babies) babbling and speaking in Italian more efficiently than I do. Maybe I will just live in America for good. Problem solved.

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